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24-03-2008, 12:51 PM
|  | | | Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: New Mexico, USA
Posts: 845
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I cry silently too, because if i made crying noises as a kid, the beating would continue until i stopped making noise. |
25-03-2008, 06:22 AM
|  | | | Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Indiana, USA
Posts: 253
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If I am really, REALLY scared (maybe something like when I first latch onto a trigger) the tears just come out silently. I'm afraid that if I open my mouth, I will start screaming, and once I start screaming, its hard to stop.
If my husband catches on and talks to me gently and holds me, I start just crying uncontrollably, and sometimes it can get kind of loud.
The most embarrassing thing... once I was in one of those states and crying so hard that the neighbors (apartment building) called the cops because they thought my husband had hurt me! He came out of the shower to find a cop standing there with his gun drawn and when I followed I heard the cop yell at me to get out there and when I explained what had happened the cop didn't even seem to know what PTSD was! He asked if I could tell him about it or if it was too personal... and I had to repeat "PTSD" to him like three times so he could write it down. SOOOO VERYYYY EMBARRASSING. I was depressed about that for days. :( |
31-03-2008, 05:07 PM
| | | | Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 29
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The garden has been a very good place for me 2 |
17-04-2008, 01:52 PM
| | | | Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 18
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i can really blubber sometimes , for the last 2 weeks i can cry at the drop of the hat. Makes it very tricky at work. |
14-07-2008, 04:45 AM
| | | | Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 121
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yeah, crying at work was the hardest to deal with. I was in a cubicle but had a lot of phone and radio communications. People detect such things in your voice and then your work gets harder because they call to find out if I have a cold - or something else. |
15-07-2008, 04:03 AM
|  | | | Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Indianapolis, In
Posts: 83
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Anymore, I cry silently. I don't want my children or my husband to hear me do so. |
15-07-2008, 04:07 PM
|  | | | Join Date: May 2008 Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 110
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For a long time, I couldn't cry. As a victim of domestic abuse, crying only made the beatings worse, as I was only trying to get attention... The 3 years after the most severe trauma, I could not cry, not even during a tear jerker movie. I was emotionally numb, shut off.
Nowadays, since beginning therapy 8-9 months ago, in extreme anxiety I will cry silently because I do not want to distress my children and my partner. I cannot function when drawn to tears because it takes a toll on me and doesn't let go, like everything hits me at once, and I'll curl up into a ball and cry for hours. I can't breath when I cry, almost like my throat is being pressed on and my chest feels heavy.. and I can't have an audience, it only makes me feel embarrassed and vulnerable. So I cry alone. |
19-07-2008, 03:49 PM
|  | | | Join Date: May 2008 Location: southeast US
Posts: 39
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I learned early and well that crying only excited him. So I stopped. My idiot mother never learned this. Pisser is that now I CAN'T cry, no matter how deeply I feel like doing so. *sigh* red |
19-07-2008, 06:48 PM
|  | | | Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Montana, USA
Posts: 44
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I cry silently as i learned to mask my feelings at an early age. There was always the threat if someone knew. Never tell. |
19-08-2008, 02:34 AM
| | Moderated Member | | Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 6
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I used to cry silently. . . .and very very hidden.. . I couldn't cry in front of someone if my life depended on it.
Now - sometimes I cry silently - if I'm trying to control it. . .for some weird reason or another. . .but most the time I sob. I REALLY SOB.
I don't sob in front of anyone, though. . .and I tend to still really try to control it in front of people. . .but I'm finding myself less and less able to do so.
Which, I think is a good thing. I need to lose that self control in THIS aspect. I need to cry. | | Thread Tools | | | | Display Modes |  Linear Mode | 
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