Hey Ya'll!!!

My name is, Lacey. I'm originally from Mobile Alabama. currently living in New Orleans Louisiana. I'm 24 yrs old. I was diagnosed with PTSD at the begining of this month (apr. 2008).
I'm in an unusually good mood at this moment.. I geuss i'll just come out and tell you straight to the point of my many traumatic events. Mine aren't as bad as most but they apparently are for me... I was molested by my aunt's husband from the time I was 9 til I was 12, Raped at 13 (lost virginity), abandoned by my father at 4, and my mother didn't take care of me from the time I was 12 to the present, i've pretty much raised my self. I made it this far and have managed to lead a self destructive path until recently, thanks to the pshych ward!
Also, along the way managed to take care of 2 girls of my own which I watch like a hawk! I have a wonderful man in my life whom I love dearly and he's stuck with me when no one else wanted to. He's my 3rd rock! (my girls are first!)
I feel like life is starting to look up for me these days. More than I could say a Year ago. I've constantly battled with flashbacks of the above as well as nightmares. I've always had panic attacks but have been experincing them more frequently lately.
I am slowly healing!!
Well hope to hear from ya'll and make some friends here.

Crazy in Louisiana,
Lacey

Hello I'm new hear as well.
You said that your traumatic events aren't as bad as most here.
I disagree you have the same symptoms as anyone and everyone else here regardless what event triggered it. I'm only guessing but I would think sexual abuse is probably one of the leading causes of PTSD. And like me now that i've been seeing a therapist and talking about it and now finding this board my emotional state has been more fragile to say the least. Have you been talking about it more than you did in the past ? The fact that you found this forum recently as I did would suggest to me that it's likely
As I'm learning as you start dealing with it more openly it gets worse before it gets better.

Hello and Welcome Lacey! Sounds like you are starting down the right path. There is lots to read on the forum and lots of people to talk to. Good luck with your journey.

Sisu

Hello I am new here as well
You say your trauma isn't as bad as most here
There is no rating here as to "as bad as or worse than".You have the same symptoms and reactions as any and everyone else here regardless of what happened.

Hi Lacey, Welcome to the forum

I think most people here would agree that PTSD is PTSD however you got it.
There is lots of information here and plenty of people with wise words when you feel ready to post.

Hi Lacey, I haven't posted my intro yet but you and I have had some very similar experiences. I am glad to hear that you have been able to rise above your challenges and be a good mom to your girls. I have two children too, and caring for them, I believe, has been a big part of my healing process. I think PTSD makes us so aware of how we DON'T want our children to feel, that we work really hard to surround them with love, respect and support. Everything we did not receive. At times, it's almost painful to watch them blossom, and think how we may have responded if the adults in our lives had treated us the same way. However, we cannot change the past, only the future. When I start to feel depression and loneliness take me over, I remind myself that my children know me, love me and want to be with me. And their love is totally unconditional. Your girls don't think you are crazy. See yourself through their eyes, and you will learn to love yourself more and refocus your thoughts away from the events that traumatized you. I think it is a process of reprogramming (at least, this is the conclusion I have come to by myself recently) and having children does give us a very concrete focus to direct our attention towards. It will be a slow process and take all your strenght but you two of the best reasons for working hard at this. Good luck and hope to chat with you sometime.

Welcome Lacey.

Sorry I didn't think my first post went through Thought I did it wrong. So now there are two. Oh well.

thanks for all the warm welcomes!
I have noticed that its a little bit easier to talk than before everythings out in the open now.. Sorry if i offended anyone with my "worse" mcomment, i was ignorant to the fact that PTSD is PTSD. I never thought of it like that. Also, i tend have the "all or nothing" thinking going on and seems like everyday i notice it! I am glad i happend upon this forum, we all need all the support and an outlet! since i posted last i finally got my driver's license! yes i know 24 years old and no license is pretty bad but its gave me something to feel accomplished and independent about.
My emotions are alot more fragile these days. Last night just riding down burbon st. with all the noise from the bars made me have to take deep breaths and fight off panic, i used to work in a bar and it didnt bother me until alot of people were in there, its like everyone is breathing all the air and there's none for me! lol anyways i feel like im going to start rambling, so thanks again for the replies hope to chat with everyone soon.

evelena,
I totally agree with you. When I had my daughter I was extra cautious of the men I let in my life with my daughter. I watched around corners, pretended I was sleeping, pretended to go to the restroom ect. Listening with big ears as to making sure they weren't pervs. I also taught her at a young age to be aware of her surrounding. Much more protective than my mom who thinking my uncle was up to something but never paying attention to the signs due to her drinking on what he did to me time and time again.
sunnydaze.