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| | Notices | Welcome to PTSD Forum. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a life threatening, debilitating disorder that can break down a sufferer’s body through anxiety and stress. Further it poses a significant suicide risk resulting from the brains neurological imbalance and chemical depression. Sufferers often live in denial, thus this community is aimed at helping PTSD sufferers help themselves through others experiences, guidance and education. We are here for the sufferer, spouse and families surrounding PTSD. Spouses and family are too often forgotten in this equation, and often they receive all the worst that PTSD has to offer. If you're involved in any way with PTSD, get registered and help yourself now. Non-active members will eventually be deleted. If you are not a sufferer, carer or someone within the mental health industry, and active, then there is little reason for you to be a member of this forum. Non-active members with zero posts are deleted periodically during the year. |  | | 
02-09-2008, 10:22 PM
| | Moderated Member | | Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 16
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It is my husband I believe who suffers PTSD and your honesty here helps me to know what NOT to say! At least not say anymore. I have understood his pain and know why it cuts him so deeply, but I must admit while trying to help I have said somethings that probably weren't. I can see it more clearly now and I thank you all. |
05-09-2008, 05:52 PM
|  | | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: NW USA
Posts: 29
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I heard this a few days ago when I was trying to explain to a friend why I was in such a dark mood..."You should stop living in the past, drop the bad feelings and memories for a change"
I wanted to smack him into tomorrow, but decided that he was a narrow minded idiot instead and not worth the effort. |
07-09-2008, 04:06 PM
| | | | Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Southern California
Posts: 24
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(The Serenity Prayer - that's priceless. I mean it's a good prayer but not a good suggestion!)
My last fired therapist said, "Gosh, you're such a nice person and all these bad things keep happening to you! Why is that?!" I wanted to reach through the phone and throttle her! |
12-09-2008, 01:44 PM
| | Moderated Member | | Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 8
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As a carer I have been guilty of saying some of these things when anger is directed at me.
As a sufferer, the things I most despise hearing are:
relax!
don't sweat the small stuff!
are you sure *the abuse* was intentional?
you're paranoid
everybody has bad things happen |
14-09-2008, 07:43 PM
| | | | Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 24
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I've had:
Just let go of the past
Cant you see that's what Im bloody trying to do
Why do you keeping raking up the past
Because it's raking up me...and because I need to come to terms with it
and in relation to me healing myself
why don't you stop doing this to yourself
because stopping feels far worse than actually doing something about it
You're too sensitive ( I hate this one)
You bet I bloody am, so would you have been if you'd been through the same thing |
15-09-2008, 08:01 PM
| | | | Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 73
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but wait! there's more!
If it was THAT bad why didn't you leave before now???
Oh I don't believe that, he wouldn't do that!
If I even suspected he was doing that I would have been gone so fast!!!
You're just being vindictive.
Your counselors are as crazy as YOU are! |
04-10-2008, 02:43 AM
|  | | | Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 301
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When I told some friends of 20 years one of them said "Well at least it's not something too serious, like, you know, cancer or something life threatening." 
Void |
04-10-2008, 03:15 AM
|  | | | Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 371
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My gosh........After reading all these things, I've decided how imperitive it is for us to be very judicious about who we tell. When I was in my first couple of years of therapy and angry, I told just about anyone. I was indeed condemned with the same insensitive comments.
After all we have been through, there is absolutely no need to have to defend ourselves once again. Most of us have been through horrible wars, either in childhood or overseas.........the lack of respect for our scars is abhorrent to me.
If I am strong enough someday, an awareness campaign regarding PTSD and mental illness in general would be so valuable for this society. Unfortunately, we live in a culture that is horribly screwed up, judgemental and nonsupportive. Especially now, with all the vets coming back, my hope is people can find it in their hearts to have compassion for others who have damage brains and souls.
This is my prayer Lord. |
04-10-2008, 10:17 AM
| | | | Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Detroit
Posts: 402
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When I was little, I used to cry all the time and scream in my sleep. Of course it was because my mother's friend repeatedly raped me-but to cover it up, my mother tried to convince me that I was just "over sensitive" and she used to tell people that too! They sucked it up like candy!
...alas, that's not the worse insult I've ever encountered. After the accident, when I couldn't even walk across the street (I'd stand there, frozen at the edge of the sidewalk), my Ex said, "Your mind isn't made of glass." It was before the PTSD diagnose. Of course, there were the standbys, "You're just being paranoid," and "Get over it."
In our society, conformity and silence is far more important than healing and acceptance. Let's not make the same mistakes concerning shell shock in WWI and PTSD in WWII and Korea and Vietnam and all other conflicts up until now--let's raise awareness!
Last edited by midi; 04-10-2008 at 10:19 AM.
Reason: wording
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04-10-2008, 10:59 PM
|  | | | Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 55
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