What to Never Say to a PTSD Sufferer - Page 4

cactus_jack · #31 31-05-2008, 03:58 PM

The key factor I think all of you will agree with me on, is those without the problem of PTSD have all the answers. They are, somehow, one step below Jesus Himself and they have alllllll the answers. They just leave it up to us because we are somehow not AS deserving as they are. We must somehow earn their level of holiness. HOW we earn it, they won't say. Of course. WHAT the answers are, they only hint at.

We're not special enough.

At least that is the impression I have.

And for those that really do think that we not special/holy enough, they can shove it right up their <expletive>.

becvan · #32 31-05-2008, 04:55 PM

Interesting.. the title did change! I wonder why?

bec

FightingLily · #33 31-05-2008, 05:23 PM

Hope brought the title change to my attention in a PM. She also conveyed some concerns about the direction this thread has taken.

She is absolutely right, it did read "What to NEVER say to a PTSD Sufferer". My intentions were as stated at the bottom of the post: to get those things off people's chests, to educate, and to get a laugh or two if willing....

I don't know how to change the title, so I must assume the change was made by a moderator.

cactus_jack · #34 31-05-2008, 09:40 PM

I want to apologize for what I said, I re-read it and found I left entire words out. I did not mean to mislead or insult others.

linasmom · #35 31-05-2008, 11:55 PM

Lily - I've changed the title to reflect the original version - not sure how it got changed!!

Best,
Rachel

Cecilia · #36 01-06-2008, 07:28 AM

I must admit, I have not posted on this thread because for me, I have to go to a negative mind set to think about what people say that make me angry. When people make flippant remarks I remember and try to avoid them or at least limit future conversations with them.

It might be more constructive to discuss how we handle negative remarks more than just making a list. It is good to get things off your chest, but when it exudes with negative energy, it only brings me down. JMO.

Cecilia · #37 01-06-2008, 09:01 AM

You know, I thought about this a little bit more and yes people have said some rude remarks, but when I think about the things I have said to my carers, it more than evens things out.

We cannot control what people say, we can only control our reactions, the way we view it and the way we respond. They are totally out of our control.

All we can do is try to be kind to ourselves and those around us.

I think I better take a break for a while.

brokenchild · #38 01-06-2008, 01:22 PM

I have heard most of the things in this thread as well.

When I finally got the nerve to tell someone, first my psychologist who had to tell my social worker, Children Services told me I had "false memories" because I waited so long to tell (it was 3-4 years after the last episode). Tell the x-ray of my fractured vertebra it's a false memory than get back to me.

On the other side of the coin, you get comments like:
"Why didn't you tell someone?"

What a GREAT idea, except I was threatened, the family I lived with was threatened, I knew what happened to me when I tried to run away and can't imagine what they would have done had I told.

"Things like that don't happen. You're making it up"
Yes, I'm making up the scars and x-rays also. I'm making up the panic attacks and nightmares too. I WANT to feel like I'm dying and/or it's happening all over again when I talk about what happened. It's all part of my game. WTH???

2quilt · #39 01-06-2008, 02:43 PM

Should we start another thread about 'How to Respond to Careless PTSD Remarks" or something like that, like Cecilia said? I agree, making the list in this thread is helpful because it lets us know that we are not alone in the reception of careless remarks, slights, insults, put-downs, verbal slaps... you get the picture.
But also, as Cecilia said, we need a cache of responses to hopefully enlighten that careless speaker. Can I add some smartass verbal slaps for responses, oh please, please, please? Because some careless remarks are simply because the speaker is not educated on PTSD, and sometimes the speaker is just an ashhole who means to cause us pain.
Either way, we need verbal ammunition.

cactus_jack · #40 02-06-2008, 04:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cecilia

I must admit, I have not posted on this thread because for me, I have to go to a negative mind set to think about what people say that make me angry.

Oh, well, that's not hard for me at all!

I know I take breaks from here when I feel a need, Cecelia. So if you feel you have to, no worries. When you feel you are ready to return, you are still welcome to come back.

I say this a lot, I know, but I mean it and it's legit- you're in my prayers!