Hello again,
I just wanted to take the time to thank those who replied, very quickly, to my post. It's a nice feeling to know that I am not alone out there and to know that my feelings are normal. I have always been the typical guy, feeling like I can get over anything on my own. That was, of course, until the day of my accident. That was it for me. That was as close to death as I want to get at this point in my young life. I have been through so much in my life alreadt, that adding this to my long list of painful experiences, just makes things so much more unbearable. I am just 30 years old. When I was 19, I lost my best friend in an accident while he was training in the Coast Guard. We were the best of friends and very close. I know for a fact that I will never find anyone who I will be that close to again, besides my wife. He died in June of 1998, 4 days after his birthday and 4 days before mine. In August, he was to be the best man in my wedding. It was a terribly sad part of what should have been the happiest ceremony, to announce that there was no replacement best man, as I would not have anyone else but him. I stood there alone, with a picture of him beside me. That was 10 years ago and I am still brought to tears when I think of his dad giving the speech in his place. The following year, my father passed away after 20+ years of battling heart disease. When I was 25, my wife was pregnant and went into labor early. We lost our daughter, who died at birth. It was absolutely devastating. I'm still nowhere near over that. I don't think I ever will be. In February of 2007, my mom passed away very suddenly, without warning. She had health issues, but no one had any idea she was at risk of dying. And now I was in this car accident, that could have easily taken my life and the life of my only child. I should have probably looked for some counseling years ago, when I had all these other tragedies in my life, but I was too stubborn and too proud. Maybe now is the best time to try to resolve all of these issues that have been building up for over a decade.

I hope to get to know you all better. Once my membership on this site has been approved, I will be able to personally thank you all for your help and your genuine care. For now, just know that your words have helped me already and I hope to maybe give advice to some others on their problems, if I can help in any way. So thanks again, and I look forward to getting to know you all. My name is Ben, by the way. Just in case anyone wants to address me personally.

Yeah, that's a lot of stuff bottled up for a long time...Have look around the forum. There's lots of good info here and lots of people who understand. Oh...and...welcome to the forum :)

Hi Ben,

Welcome to the forum....You have had a few tragedies in your life, but the amazing thing...You have made it through all of them, and you will through this too.

Wishing you well....

Welcome to the forum.

Welcome to the forum :)

Hi Ben-----It's kind of good (in a perverted way) to know that someone else is suffering with PTSD after a build-up of events. I keep thinking that nothing really horrific (like some of the things that have happened to people here) have happened to me, but my counsellor tells me that when your heart has been broken by another event or your spirit bruised, then another trauma happening on top of that can really wipe you out. It sounds like you've had a series of them, one after another every couple of years. Even one of them would be like an earthquake in your life, and look how many you've had.

Getting support and help here and especially feeling that I'm not crazy and not alone, has helped me immensely. And being able to occasionally help others really helps me feel not quite so useless and a waste of space. It's good to know that when I can't really explain to others in my life how this wipes me out, that there are people here who just understand without any explanation.

I hope this forum does the same for you too!

Rivergirl