Anyone a Civilian That Was Stuck in a War?

lost_girl · #1 13-09-2006, 08:15 AM

Help! I need someone to talk to who has been through something similar to me. I was stuck in Lebanon visiting family during the war this summer and had to sit there, hiding in the basement while missiles fell and collapsed the roof of the house we were in. Hamdillah ("Thank God" in Arabic) everyone in my family is okay, but it took me several weeks to get out of there...We hid in a smaller village in the mountains. For a period of over two weeks I averaged less than 3 hours of sleep a night. 24-7 we heard jets flying overhead and dropping bombs. Since then I have had so many nightmares and auditory hallucinations in the middle of the night. I'm seeing a psychologist and psychiatrist but can't seem to get better as fast as I need to to get back to work full-time. I'm a high school teacher and am going nuts working only part-time because I'm letting my kids down.

The picture I attached best sums up how I feel...I've been experimenting with oil painting to release stress since i got back.

Respond soon if you can relate.

kimG · #2 13-09-2006, 08:33 AM

Lost Girl,

Welcome to the forum. We are glad you are here!

I've never been in a situation where bombs were dropping around me; my PTSD came from abuse while I was growing up. However, I can only imagine what you went through and understand what you are experiencing right now. You are very wise to seek help so soon after it happened, because your healing will be much quicker than someone like me who waited 35 years or so to get help for it.

I, too, am a teacher and I love my job (I teach middle school). I completely understand about your feeling of "letting the kids down" because I constantly worry if I am doing a good job when it comes to my students.

Hang in there; it will get better. In the mean time, you've got us! Feel free to rant, rave, complain, cry, get angry, etc. We've all been there, done that...and we understand.

Kim

anthony · #3 13-09-2006, 08:59 AM

Hi Lost Girl,

Welcome to the forum. I am a veteran, so I know about bombs and the fear of death 24/7 within war zones. What I will say is this, you proactive about ensuring you don't end up with PTSD, that is only a good thing. You are obviously suffering post traumatic stress, and I would highly suggest you get into regular counselling ASAP for atleast the next six months, if not more, and discuss every single aspect of your fear, leaving out nothing, regardless how much it hurts you. You are in the stages now where you can possibly stop this developing into life long hell.

I have to say, congratulations on your proactiveness to cope with this ASAP... most dwell on it until it manifests. Well done... and hopefully we can help you avoid manifestation to full PTSD.

Kerrie-Ann · #4 13-09-2006, 04:19 PM

Hi Lostgirl,

Welcome to the forum. Its good that you've found us but its better that you are seeking treatment and recognise that you have been traumatised. Early intervention is, without doubt, your best strategy in fighting stress from trauma. Keep with us on your journey, the support you will find here will benefit you and it would be great to see a positive outcome from your motivation to heal. Be kind to yourself and patient. You didn't acquire the trauma overnight and it may take a while to heal but you need to allow yourself to do that. Also please don't add guilt about your children to your list. They will be okay, if you love them and seek help for yourself.

reallydown · #5 16-09-2006, 03:21 PM

Hi Lostgirl,

Welcome to the forum. I know a little bit about being a civilian in a war zone so I have an idea of what you're going through. I also sent you a private message a couple of days ago...so feel free to respond that way too-- if it is easier for you. Anyway, glad you found the forum.

RD

cdunny · #6 16-09-2006, 06:01 PM

Wow. That is something I couldnt imagine. I know that it must be incredibly difficult to continue on like nothing happened. Thats what is the kicker with PTSD. The rest of the world cant see whats wrong and understand that you need a break. But we are here for you. Welcome to the Forum and vent all you need. I think the painting is wonderful. What a great way to get out your emotions. I would try art but it would just be stick men.:tongue:

carpediem2006 · #7 18-09-2006, 01:55 AM

Hi there

Personally no, but I did live with some people who fled Yugoslavia and were living in exile with me throughout that war. It is not just what happened to you most likely, but the concerns you may have for those you have left behind there.

There are things you cannot change, just as there are things I cannot. Right now I am reaching a place where I can sea the luck that I have had through the negatives that happened.

It may sound ridiculous but things could have been worse...you sound like you are physically fit, and also that your family remain well physically also. That is the invaluable part. It is hard, but the nightmares and flashbacks are a normal coping mechanism for the body in my belief to deal with an abnormal situation. Dreams allow the subconcious to release its tensions. They are just that much higher right now and no longer the type of typical nightmares we all have about falling etc.

With time I came to accept my nightmares for what they were on waking, and not feel anxiety so much about them. I would roll over and go back to sleep. It will get better, it's just the first throes of recovery, even though it may not seem like it at the moment.